Have you ever found yourself in an unpleasant situation, asking, Should I walk away and start over? If you’re anything like me, you’ve probably faced this question. I’ve been in this situation, and I want to reassure you: you will not be given anything you cannot handle.
Once upon a time, I was in a very unhealthy relationship. At just 20 years old, I found myself in it, and by 21, we were married. Deep down, I knew the relationship wasn’t good, but I was terrified of starting over. I wanted so badly to make it work, to fix things, but at the same time, I wanted to walk away—and I didn’t know how. Fear and anxiety consumed me, filling my mind with endless what-ifs. I decided to stay for a while, but eventually, I had enough.
Why is it that, as humans, we often need to face difficult situations before we realize we deserve better? Sometimes, that’s our wake-up call. And though it’s hard, it’s better to realize it late than never.
When I finally chose to walk away from my unhealthy relationship, it felt like a weight had been lifted from my shoulders—the weight of trying to be perfect, the weight of trying to fix someone who didn’t want to change, and the weight of being there for people who were not there for me.
Change can be terrifying, but on the other side of fear might be the life you’ve always dreamed of. At 24 years old, I decided to move to a new country, learn a new language, and start over. Looking back, I know that facing those obstacles shaped me. Without them, I don’t know where I’d be today. Stepping out of my comfort zone was one of the best decisions I ever made. It made me stronger, wiser, and more open to the world around me.
So often, the things we ask for lie hidden in the challenges we face. Diamonds are formed under pressure. Olives must be pressed to release their oil. Seeds grow in darkness. Grapes must be crushed to make wine.
Appreciate your dark times—they are a gift.